The best men in the Philippines

Leonard Woods, a governor general of the Philippines during the American regime once said, "The best men in the Philippines are the women." Absurd for someone who would take the words literally but as i continue to ponder on it, i know, i agree with him.

I grew up in a family with my mother as my mother and my father. She raised us up as normal kids and was even able to send us to school given the very limited resources that she had. And the man of the family - our father - he was somewhere making another family which will later on be under my mom's care. He died leaving nothing for his children even the children he bore down in Mindanao.

When i married, my husband had to go abroad to find work as a factory worker though he had been one of the best student teachers during our time. He abhorred doing the papers and so he went. I was left with a girl barely two years old and i was pregnant with our second. For most of my married years, i was alone raising my kids though of course, he usually sent financial support.

I hated it at first. I would terribly miss him and my only consolation was having my kids around to distract me from falling into a great depression. But, i also learned to depend on myself. I learned to stand on my own and not depend on a husband who may not be around to hammer the nail or even to carry bed. I may be a woman but i can also do the work of a man.

Yet, while i was glowing in my achievements as a man and a woman of the house, i forgot that my husband is but a man in need. Until one day when i came to realize that he was calling less and less until less is never even for about two or more months. I contained myself and prayed that things will be fine and things will go back to normal. But then, what is normal to us may not be normal to others. Yes, a normal family would come together in the morning for breakfast and in the evening for dinner but we never did that.

Until last night.... I was about to go to bed when a sudden realization slapped me right in the face. I was in Grade III when my father left us. My daughter is in Grade III now. Will it be history repeating itself? At least for me before, it was a great relief when my father finally went coz my mom can now lay down to rest at night not afraid of somebody waking her up with a punch in the wee hours of the morning. However, how about my daughter and my son? They can't say it's a relief. Even if their father had not been a physically present father, they have been in touch with each other so much so that i know they are hurt more than i am.

However, i am still one of the best men in the Philippines. Women can stand up and still prioritize their children more than their hurt. Yes, that is why they are the best men - an example of strong faith, muscled responsibility, cushioned comfort and so on. They don't just rely on tomorrow, they work for tomorrow whether the man of the house is present or not.

This then is a call for the women left by their men - BE A MAN. Tomorrow is a better day.